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[22 Mar 2009|08:37pm] |
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I might be incommunicado this week... know I'm subbing 3 days, maybe more, working on Capstone, getting other things done. Sorry in advance if I'm not available.
I love Joel.
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| My calling, let me show you it. |
[06 Mar 2009|03:21pm] |
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Got called to sub at Fairport today!! At the middle school that I attended. :-)
And I discovered something about myself:
I want my own classroom in a middle or high school (before it was definitely high school, but I love middle school too). I want posters on the wall and a desk filled with my stuff. And students who listen to me or even students who don't listen to me, but students. I'm usually a bit nervous before I start talking in front of the class, but once I start, I'm good to go. I love interacting with the kids, bantering with them when necessary- being an authority figure when it's needed.
I feel at home and at ease when I'm in front of the classroom. Sure I only slept from 5:45 am to 7 am this morning, sure my feet are killing me because my socks are too tight and my shoes aren't as comfortable as I thought, sure I feel like I have to hide parts of my personality in order to give off that teacher-y vibe, but that doesn't matter. I love teaching.
I love teaching. I LOVE TEACHING!
I definitely need to keep this entry somewhere where I can see it because I've questioned my calling on a regular basis- but I shouldn't... this is who I am. This is who I'm meant to be.
I Am A Teacher.
I love Joel.
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| Getting better all the time... |
[28 Feb 2009|08:53pm] |
I’ve been shunning social contact for the most part (I actually said no to hanging out), in order to get work done on my coaching and capstone stuff. I’m ahead of the game for coaching now, still behind in capstone, but I’m working on it, which is a big improvement over the whole not working on it thing. I think the fact that I only have 5 weeks until my complete draft of my capstone is due is definitely making me want to get to work on it… which is making me feel like I’m accomplishing something which is pulling me out of my random sinking depression somewhat.
Also, Erica showed that she actually cares about me by bringing me lunch from Magnolia’s Cafe, so we could have some us time while I took a break from working. That was pretty awesome and is helping me feel better about things as well. So, yay feeling better.
I feel like a douche because I haven’t been able to hang out with Sisan this week. I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve seen her and seeing as she can’t get really out of her house (stupid broken foot), I feel like it’s my fault… but I really need to get ahead on my capstone before I feel able to hang out and do social things… hopefully I can get a ton of work done tonight/tomorrow on it so we can do TV on Monday night when HIMYM is finally coming back.
Still have a huge to-do list, but I’m slowly being able to check things off, so that’s helping, too. Woohoo.
I love Joel.
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| Happy Birthday to Me! |
[10 Feb 2009|12:08am] |
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Wow, I'm 24... that is old sounding.
And also one of my favourite TV shows. Woohoo!
Celebrating by... going to class and then going to Geneseo to get my drink on with Brittany and my Joel!
I love Joel.
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[09 Feb 2009|05:19am] |
So, my birthday isn't until Tuesday, but on the 8th (Sunday), we went to Casa Larga for wine tasting and other various wine related things-- including a tour with a killer bird and a Dalek attack (Erica's new text message noise is a Dalek saying "Exterminate!" and it went off in the middle of the tour in a kinda dark basement room of the vineyard... and Susan D, Erica, and I were laughing hysterically... apparently I was trying so hard to hold the laughter in that I turned about 6 shades of red and also purple. LoL. It was a great time.
Then we went to dinner at the India House (Joel, My Dad, Iain, Susan D, Sisan, Erica, Brian Wong, Brittany, Dave, Christina and I) and thorougly enjoyed good food and the best server in the world and much hilarity ensued there as well. Brian Wong, Christina and Erica had to leave after dinner for work related purposes, which was lame, but understandable and I love them dearly and am so glad they came to dinner, etc.
Afterwards, some of us (Joel, Sisan, Iain and Susan D, Brittany and Dave) went back to my house for a rousing game of Apples to Apples and presents and cookie cake!! Iain and Susan got me an expansion for Arkham Horror which I cannot WAIT to play, Christina got me socks and a gift card for Old Navy, and Sisan got me an epic collection of things for the summer-- a great bag with a huge orange flower on it and an orange inside, adorable sunglasses, a playable Candyland towel, and trashy vampire romance novel!! It really put me in a summer-y mood, which I totally needed with all the snow and whatnot. It was of course amazingly fun and then Joel needed to go home because he has a cold, poor fiance-face and that sort of triggered everyone else to go home (lame), except for Sisan who was trapped there at my mercy! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sisan and I then proceeded to talk until about 2:30 in the morning, stopping every hour or so to say that I should probably take her home soon. Oops. It was so much fun and was definitely much needed girl-talk time. I'm so glad that everyone could come out and celebrate my birthday, especially Sisan because it got her out of her house and she suffered through foot pain/pain killer times being off/maybe making her mom mad (she stayed up until I brought Sisan home) to spend time with me on my birthday and it was freaking awesome.
It was an epic birthday and I am grateful for the awesome people in my life that I got to share it with. :-D
I love Joel.
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| BloggityBlogBlog, BloggityBlogBlog, Look at Suzi go... |
[05 Feb 2009|12:10am] |
Hi! I’m blooooooogging. That totally looks like it should be pronounced bloogging instead of blogging… blaaaaaaaaaaaahgging? Blagging? (which means robbing in British) Bliggity Bloggity Bloo?
Sorry about that… just writing what my brain is saying to me, sometimes not the best of ideas.
Last week, I subbed for the first time! Woohoo. It was for an 11th grade US History class… and all I was doing was handing out tests, getting the kids to work quietly and taking attendance. Woohoo? Not so exciting. And I totally agreed with the kids complaining/grumbling/whining because they had taken the history Regents exam the day before… and then they came to class an their teacher gave them another test?? Oh, and he called it a “reading check” even though it was 3 pages long and included multiple choice, short answer, AND ESSAYS! WTF? Oh well. They seeemed to realized that although I sympathized with them in their test-taking woe, there was nothing I could do about it, so they worked rather well.
It reminded me that I really do like being in the classroom and bantering with the kids… example conversation:
Kid: Mr Teacherface* told us we could work with partners on this.
Me: Oh did he? Strange how you didn’t know about the quiz/test/check then…
Kid: We knew, we were just hoping you didn’t.
Me: Mmmhmm, well, Mr Teacherface* didn’t say that you could work with partners, so I’m going to have to go with No on that.
Kid: Well, we wouldn’t tell him.
Me: Ahh, but what about the 2 other classes that had to take the test without partners?
Kid: We could talk to the FBI and get a mind erasey thing so that they wouldn’t know… and you wouldn’t know.
Me: As much as I appreciate your creativity, FBI, mind erasing and everything… No partners, no books, no notes.
Apparently the FBI can erase people’s minds… kinda makes sense. *shrug* It was fun though and I jumped on the opportunity to sub again on Tuesday… for an ENGLISH CLASS!! Woohoo! I was all excited that I’d get to teach English and stuff and yay, and then I got there and found out that the teacher I was subbing for had a student teacher. So… I spent the whole day sitting there doing nothing, which hey, I got paid $65 to play games, do homework, and work on wedding plans… but I was actually looking forward to teaching. Also, I thought I’d only use my laptop during lunch, so I didn’t bring my power-cord… had I known I was going to be sitting there doing nothing, the power-cord would’ve come with me and I could’ve played the Sims 2 all day… instead of just the 3 hours of battery that I had.
I felt bad for the student teacher because it was her first time actually being in control of the kids… and she had no control. The kids were definitely testing their boundaries and found them to be super-pliable… I wanted to be like “Hey kids, sit down, be quiet and listen to your teacher” but I couldn’t because then that would’ve taken what little authority that she had away from her and put it on me… so in the upcoming weeks as she is their full-time teacher, they would know that she can’t stand up for herself and walk all over her. *sigh* I’m sure she was just nervous and jittery because it was the first time she was teaching them, but still… oh well.
I’m subbing again on the 13th and then working at Wegmans in the evening because it’s the day before Valentine’s Day (oh, and I’ll be subbing for a teacher with a student teacher, so needless to say, my power-cord, it will be coming with me). Here’s what my day will look like on the 13th.
5:30 am- Wake up.
6:20 am- Leave for subbing.
7:20 am- Arrive at school for subbing.
8:00 am-2:45 pm- Subbing.
2:45 pm- 3:45 pm- Drive home.
4:30 pm-MIDNIGHT- go to work at Wegs.
Argh, it’s going to be a long and strenuous day… but oh well, what can I do about it? Nothing.
Tomorrow (well, later today), Joel and I are going to his church to talk to Sister Joan (a nun) about what we need to do to get married there… that’s going to be a fun conversation— Joel informed me today that Sister Joan doesn’t know I’m not Catholic, or Christian, or anything… so yay for awkward meetings with nuns? I’ll let you know how that goes.
And now I’m going to go to sleeeeeeeep. Bye!
I love Joel.
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| An engaging post... |
[01 Jan 2009|05:07pm] |
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Joel and I are engaged now!!! In half an hour, it’ll have been an entire day! :-)
I was cleaning my house for the party yesterday and I was stressed out and cranky and I needed to go pick Joel up from his apartment. He told me to come up when I got there, because he needed help carrying some stuff…
When I walked in, he was sitting on the couch, with a bunch of gerbera daisies and limonium on the table! (probably some of my favourite flowers)… and we sat there for a bit just hugging and being all snuggly and he handed me a poem and told me to read it out loud… I was too embarrassed to read it out loud, so I read it to myself. Here’s the poem:
Suzi is the girl for me
I just wish that you could see
Love I feel will always be
You are the love that sets me free
Be it shining outside or raining
With you I won’t be complaining
Me, I’ll smile with you anyway
Forever loving you, day after day
I love the way you smile
Love the way you’ll stay a while
You joke around so easily
So I hope that you’ll bear with me
Will you forgive a simple jest
You always laughed at all the rest
Merry little game by a nerd
Me? I’d read each first word.
And yes, it says merry not marry, but it’s a bad pun and that’s awesome and so us.
I of course said yes… and that I would also Pippin him. :-)
He then told me that he didn’t have a ring because he looked online and at a couple places and just couldn’t find anything sufficiently “Suzi”, so we went ring shopping today!! We found a gooooooorgeous ring that was in the price range and very me. Here it is on the Kay Jewelers website: http://www.kay.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/product1|10101|10001|-1|990391601|15051|15051.15057.15107
They have to resize it and stuff, so it won’t be ready until January 15th, but until then, I’m wearing my Claddagh ring as a “placeholder”.
The wedding is probably going to be in May 2010, perhaps the 15th… but that’s not set in stone yet. We need to figure out a venue and all that jazz first!!! :-D
SOOOOO HAPPY!!!!
I love Joel, my fiance!!!! :-)
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| Should be doing work... |
[10 Dec 2008|11:53am] |
Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 3: Strike through the songs when someone guesses both artist and track correctly.
Step 4: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!
Step 5: If you like the game, post your own.
Step 6: After a week, any songs left, I will add the next line.
1) I open my eyes, I see your face, I cannot hide, I can't erase
2) Go down the 47 transfer to the 89
3) Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Okay, Searching for blood in the salty sea the sun beating down on the chest and back of me The Writhing South- Say Anything --- James
4) There's a roundabout in Paris and I swear that it's the devil's domain.
5) I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together The Beatles, I am the Walrus --- Allyson.
6) Awww you gonna take me home tonight Awww down beside that red firelight Queen, Fat Bottomed Girls --- Crystal.
7) And if there's someone you can live without, well do so. Be my Yoko Ono, BNL --- Allyson
8) On a cold winter morning in a time before the light Through the Fire and the Flames, Dragonforce --- Erica
9) It may not feel too classy begging just to eat, but you know who does that? Lassie and she always gets a treat Everyone's a Hero, Nathan Fillion, Dr. Horrible Soundtrack --- Allyson.
10) Well I really don't if it matters at all so but we try to keep the prices low on our records and our shows Johnny Quest Things We're Sellouts, Less Than Jake--- Erica
11) The working day is long and the road is grinding on
12) Now when you choose a law career the moment you embark there is that joke you're bound to hear, a lawyer is a shark
13) Why can't people get along and love each other, Christmas Eve?
14) My whole family loves Three's Company, see the reruns constantly they're on my TV
15) Time's have changed, our kids are getting worse, they won't obey their parents, they just want to fart and curse. Blame Canada, South Park Soundtrack --- James
16) Turn it up some, all right boys, this is her favorite song, you know that right?
17) Walk down the- street- see a- pretty girl-- walking up to me
18) Look at me, you may think you see who I really am, but you'll never know me
19) They see me mowing my front lawn White and Nerdy, Weird Al --- James
20) One day I will build a fountain, drink and never grow old. BNL, Some Fantastic --- Allyson
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| To Do... |
[09 Dec 2008|01:09am] |
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To Do (this week)...
Clean my room.
Clean spare bedroom.
Clean kitchen.
Clean dining room.
Clean living room.
Clean basement.
Clean hallways.
Clean bathrooms.
Finish my Multi-Genre Research Paper
Do my final assignment for DCLSTL.
Laundry.
Figure out what I need for my trip.
Pack.
Make sure Smudge has full food and water.
Clean out Smudge's litter box.
Double-check with Joel that he will be checking on Smudge/getting mail while we're gone.
Wrap presents for Anne & Jim and Pamela (PACK THEM TOO).
I love Joel.
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| Wow... |
[19 Nov 2008|03:28pm] |
I just registered for my last semester of classes.
How freaking weird is that???
My schedule for next semester:
Tuesday 4:35-7:40-- Literacy Coaching Practicum.
Thursday 4:35-7:40-- Research, Analysis and Presentation-- the 2nd half of my capstone class.
Wow... kinda surreal.
I love Joel.
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[02 Nov 2008|01:28am] |
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I've decided to try NaNoWriMo again this year. ((www.nanowrimo.org))
I don't know if I'll succeed. I did the first time I did it, back in 2002... but since I've started and not finished... I actually have a couple pre-started novels, but I'm starting fresh this year and also trying to add to one of the ones from a few years ago... I'm going to keep working on both until one really captures my attention/makes me /need/ to write.
So my word counts (at the end of day one) are currently:
New novel: 1528
Old novel: 3821
Wish me Luck!!
I love Joel.
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| 182!!! |
[10 Oct 2008|02:40am] |
So, I used to be on bowling leagues… when I was 5, I even got to bowl on local TV!!! (and I won, Woo! Yay Bumper Bowling!), but I haven’t bowled in a really long time. Then I found out my AMF Fairview Lanes (local bowling alley) does Dollar games on Thursday nights after 9. So I went last week with Susan Zorn and it was fantastically fun. I bowled reasonably well, but not great…
Tonight, I went and bowled by myself for 1.5 hours (no one else could come) and it was also super-fun and I bowled a 182!!! My highest score ever WAS a 140… so that was super exciting! I got 2 turkeys! (3 strikes in a row) and bowled better than I ever have. Woooooo!!!
I was super excited and although there was no one there to celebrate with me, I felt a great sense of accomplishment and I now think that I might be good enough to join a league… not a crazy professional league, but a fun league. :-) Woo!!
And if you are curious about my scores for the night, here they are in order of when I played them:
121 110 77 (Don't know what happened) 108 114 182 140 99
So other than the 77, I am very proud of those scores. :-)
I love Joel.
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[20 Sep 2008|04:30pm] |
Comment and I'll give you a letter; then you have to list ten things you LOVE that begin with that letter. Afterward, post this in your journal and give out some letters of your own. Megan gifted me with N. (which I've just realized is a really difficult letter)....
1. Nerds (the people)
2. Novels.
3. Nerds (the candy)
4. Nintendo Gamecube and Wii
5. Nathan (as in Joel's middle name and also ________ Fillion)
6. Nudity (of certain people, not in general...)
7. New York (State and City, not the reality tv star)
8. Narrators who are crazy/questionable/unreliable
9. Nightmare Before Christmas
10. Noises Off!
Wooo!
I love Joel.
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| Putting cat to sleep --> Depression --> Apathy/Procrastination. |
[18 Sep 2008|03:57am] |
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I don't seem to care about anything right now. I don't care about the reading that I should have done for class tomorrow and haven't. I don't care that I don't know how I'm going to do active research on my capstone topic because I'm not in a classroom. I don't care that I haven't been sleeping well. I don't care that I only have 2 days of class and yet pull all nighters to get my work done. I don't care that I've been a slacker at work recently. I just want to spend my days curled up in bed, sleeping and not thinking about how I should have a cat to snuggle with.
I keep forgetting that Sawyer's dead... Everytime I come upstairs, I expect to see him in my room. Everytime I open the door in from the garage, I expect him to make a run for it so I have to grab him before he escapes. Everytime I'm sitting around, I expect him to come sprinting towards me and use me as a piece of furniture/jumping off point to continue his race against himself. I then I remind myself that he had to be put to sleep 6 days ago because of something that was unavoidable and inevitable and the feelings of depression and then apathy get worse. I fucking hate the grieving process. I fucking hate being a slave to my emotions. Can't I just be heartless and move on?? It'd be nice. *sigh*
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| For those of you who haven't had the explanation yet. |
[14 Sep 2008|03:42am] |
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Sawyer apparently had feline leukemia in his bone marrow... which means that he was probably born with it and that it was latent until this week when it decided to become active and kill him. :-(
His red blood cell count was 7.8% instead of the healthy 25-30%. His platelet count was 7,000 when healthy range is 120,000 or so. His lymphocyte (white blood cell) count was triple what it should have been... and there was nothing they could do to save him.
They could have done a blood transfusion, but that would have been even more of a shock to his system and probably would have only given us another 12 hours to a day or two at most. And even then, the chance of him surviving was minimal.
If it wasn't feline leukemia in his bone marrow, then it was cancer in his bone marrow.... and if that had been the case, he could've been sent to Cornell for chemo-therapy, which would have been agressive and painful and probably wouldn't have worked at all...
So the only option was to put him to sleep. He was only barely over a year old. I'm glad for the 5 and a half months that we got to have him in our lives, but I definitely would have preferred 18-20 years with him.
He was my first cat in many ways. I adopted him, he lived in my room for the most part, I fed him, I cuddled with him at night, I took him to the vet's. He knew that I was his Mama and he was my baby and I really can't handle the fact that he is gone. It just isn't fair.
I miss him terribly. Especially at night because that was when he would cuddle up to me.
I love Joel.
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| RIP Sawyer 8/28/07-9/12/08 |
[12 Sep 2008|08:03pm] |
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mood |
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Sawyer had to be put to sleep today.
I don't want to talk about it.
I just want my cat back.
I love Joel.
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[05 Sep 2008|03:03am] |
So, my 2nd to last semester as a graduate student (and a student at all? unless I crazily decide try for a phD) has begun.
My first class was on Wednesday and is GRDG 670: Research Methods: Design and Development and is just as exciting as it sounds... in other words, not so exciting. It is being taught by 2 professors, one of which is my advisor and the other I have never had before and I have heard that he is not the most professional of professors... which usually would be okay with me, but I've heard it is incredibly distracting... but I will not let other's opinions colour mine... so I don't really know about him as a professor yet. Ummmm... the class is going to be a lot of work and rather difficult, but it IS the first half of our "Capstone" project... so it's kinda supposed to be. I have NO IDEA what I want to do my capstone on... it's essentially a thesis/action research/paper of dooooooom.... and we have to come up with our topics. And they have to be "Glocal", taking global theory and applying it to something local to us [read: our own classrooms, something I do not have]. I'm thinking about doing something with critical literacy and technology or computers and the netterwebz and their effect (positive or negative) on literacy acquisition or um... something. As you can see, I don't really know... and this project/research/paper will be taking up much of my life for the next YEAR... so it needs to be something that I won't get bored with in five minutes... so I need to think about it like mad whoa.
My other class is going to be... AWESOME! It is the first class I've taken in my literacy program that is specifically adolescent based!!! WOOO! And because of that, there are only 9 of us in the class.............. which kinda shows you how elementary/primary based this program is and why I've been RIPPING MY HAIR OUT being forced to colour in class. COLOUR! ARGH! Anyway... that is not the point. This class is GRDG 652: Developing Critical Literacy Skills Through Literature, and I am super excited! It is going to be very theory heavy, BUT our professor wants it to be applicable, so it will be super-theory based but PRACTICAL Wooo!!! AND my professor is freaking awesome. She is new to the area (like moved here 4 weeks ago) and is from Tennessee. She is young, energetic, interesting, intelligent, a bit self-deprecating, technology-obsessed, and fun. She definitely knows her stuff, but I can tell that this class will be interesting and fun and awesome. [She teaches the way that I expect Prof. H. teaches, which makes me happy on so many levels]. She is definitely free-spirited and opinionated and well versed in the theory that she will be teaching us. She also understands how being a graduate student can be and has already cut our class down from 3 hours and 5 minutes to 2 hours and 40 minutes because that is all she is required to "instruct" us and she wants class to be more of a seminar than a lecture. And I am really excited.
We are going to be discussing how to incorporate new criticism, reader response, feminist theory, queer theory, and of course critical literacy and I am sooooooo looking forward to it. Which is weird, considering how I normally feel about theory... but maybe it was because the professor for the other theory-based class should not be allowed to teach, but I'm not going to complain about her because I'll end up in a bad mood.
In other news, I am mailing my substitute teaching application to Fairport tomorrow... so hopefully something will come from that.
My distance learning floral design course is going well, although my procrastinatey self has been rearing it's ugly head... and that needs to be fixed.... but I'm going to work on this stuff on Sunday and Monday this week. :-)
Joel comes back from his business trip tomorrow, and I can't wait to see him!
Things are going well for now, which is a nice change.
I love Joel.
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